Monthly Archives: October 2016

About Mentors And Sponsors

by Anja Uitdehaag

The difference between mentoring and sponsorship is the level of active involvement in helping you with your career. Mentors offer advice and guidance that help you to grow in your career, in your field and within your company. Sponsors speak up for you on your behalf in your absence, introduce you to people who might be able to help you (and vice versa!), and put you on the radar screens of people who can help further your career.

Throughout my career multiple mentors and sponsors took part in my continuous development and growth, both males and females. Each of them brought in unique experiences that added to my understanding of how to play the game of business. Continue reading

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The Key To Our Success

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From the moment we are born we develop both our motives and values.  Motives are deep-seated non-conscious desires and are the things that we enjoy doing.  Values develop through social conditioning – home, school, religion, work, friends etc. Values are what we feel are important; the things we should do.

David McClelland’s theory on human motivation states that in normal, healthy human beings there are 3 social motives and values that describe the widest range of behaviors:

  • achievement,
  • affiliation and
  • power.

Achievement is a concern for achieving a standard of excellence that the individual sets for him/herself.  Often people with a dominant achievement motive strive for mastery and expertise in their chosen field.

Affiliation is concerned with having positive relationships for the sake of the relationship (and not in service of something else).  Individuals with a dominant affiliation motive invest in a few, deep relationships and often have strong reactions towards others – they are clear whom they like and dislike.  They prefer environments that are convivial and foster friendship.

The power motive is a concern to have influence and impact on others.  People with a dominant power motive like to have an audience and visibility.  They are often good networkers.

There is no ‘right’ motive profile that determines success; we are all different.

The key to our success lies in understanding what drives our behavior in various situations; this is a combination of our motives and our values (what we believe is important at the time) and the conditions that we find ourselves in.

Defining personal success is a journey of self-discovery; you need to figure out what is your true purpose, what you are passionate about, what you enjoy and find ways at work to satisfy that need. You must to listen to your inner voice rather than be influenced by others so that you can lead a fulfilling life and not feel regret when you retire because you did not follow your heart.

Anja Uitdehaag

Lindsay’s In Business, Part 7. The big stone in Scotland

by Lindsay Uittenbogaard (you can find previous parts of Lindsay’s story here: Part 1Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5, Part 6)

My ex-colleague, James had introduced me to a guy called Jeremy, who runs a Leadership Development consultancy in London. I went over to meet him and outlined the basic concept:

We want to find out what team members think is important and why, so that Team Leaders have a better handle on how people understand about their context. With that, the Team Leader can organise more effective engagement and teamwork. 

He was keen.  “Context, yes.  That could be the missing piece.  Sounds good. Let me know when you’re further down the track.”

Good. We have interest from a potential partner.

And now it’s August. Continue reading

Situation 27: CHANGING PRIORITIES

Femsy is struggling with the fact that since she is working in “Co-Colours” her friends are complaining about her more hectic working schedule. Femsy realizes that not only her job has changed, but as a result her life has changed as well.

(Click on the pictures to see them in full size) Continue reading

What It’s Like Living With OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)

by matheen

According to UOCD (Understanding Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) website’s facts and figures, there are 3.3 million people living with OCD in the U.S., of which you have 0.3 to 1% of the pediatric population and 2% of adult population. In Canada, approximately 1 to 2% of the Canadian population will have an episode of OCD with slightly more women experiencing the disorder compared to men in adulthood. Over 90% people with clinical OCD will have both obsessions and compulsions. Some people would often joke about having OCD casually; they think it’s a cool quirk to have. Unfortunately, it’s neither a joke nor a cute quirk for those who are clinically diagnosed to be one. Au contraire, it is distressing and causes anguish for those who live and deal with OCD on a daily basis.

Continue reading

Growing Your Career

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“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step” (Lao-Tzu)

If you want to continue moving forward in your career, you must continue growing your skills.

Once you have a solid and clear idea of the direction you want your life and career to go, it is also important to have a plan to help you excel.

Make your personal development plan a commitment to yourself!

Your development plan could look as follows:

  • What do I want to achieve 6 months, 3 years and 5 years from now?
  • What are my strengths and areas for development?
  • What do I want to learn? (learning objectives)
  • What do I have to do? (overview of learning actions)
  • What support and resources will I need? (i.e. books, regular review meetings with your manager, sparring partner, coach etc.)
  • How will I measure success?
  • Completion date

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it.

Begin it now!

On Femflection.com you will find useful websites for your continuous personal development.

Anja Uitdehaag

Multi-Tasking

by Anja Uitdehaag

Doing several things simultaneously makes you feel like you’re getting lots of things done. However, multitasking is a myth; it doesn’t exist. When you attempt to do several things your brains actually switch their focus from one task to another instead of effectively doing two things simultaneously. So, what you’re really doing is task-switching – switching your attention from task to task extremely quickly.

Researchers and neuroscientists around the world, including those at Harvard, Stanford, and the University of London, agree that multitasking is a problem. It makes you less efficient, less effective and over time, it stresses and even damages the brain. Continue reading

Philip Houston, Michael Floyd, Susan Carnicero and Don Tennant, “Spy the Lie: Former CIA Officers Teach You How to Detect Deception”.

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Reviewed by Femflection

How to spot a lie and get people to tell you the truth?

Philip Houston, Michael Floyd, and Susan Carnicero – former CIA officers – are among the world’s best at recognizing deceptive behavior.

In “Spy the Lie” they share their proven techniques for uncovering a lie. They show how a special methodology which was developed to detect deception in the counterterrorism and criminal investigation can be applied in our daily lives.

Continue reading

Walking In A Single Woman’s Shoes

by matheen

Living in today’s digital age confirms that we are in the passage of a remarkable sea change — the evolution of women’s status — staying single and putting off marriage by choice.  In the 60’s, the average age for women to marry ranged between 18 and 29.  Fast forward to today, that number has declined by leaps and bounds! Kristin Dombeck’s New York Times report last Sept. 9, 2015, states, “The number of women between 30 and 34 who are not marrying has increased by 31% between 2007 and 2012.” These numbers show exceptional attitudinal shifts on women – reflecting that women aren’t single because there are fewer men around; women are single because they simply choose to be.

What does it mean to be a single woman? Let’s see what it’s like by walking in a single woman’s shoes as we navigate through life in various key areas — social, political, family, and financial areas — circa 2016. Continue reading

You Are Really One-Of-A-Kind

by Anja Uitdehaag

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life and don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. Most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become.” – Steve Jobs

There are over seven billion people on this earth. No two people are truly alike. No two people can ever have the same experience of life, the same perspective, the same mind. Even identical twins are different. Continue reading