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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

I wrote last time about not trying too hard, about not trying to push Mirror Mirror onto other people, learning that if you show respect for their space and their decision, they’re more likely to come towards you.

Since then, I’ve been very conscious of a big area of discomfort: the thought that 2020 will be all about marketing.  And I draw away from that.  I’ve had too many experiences of putting a ton of effort in and feeling like it all disappears into a vacuum.  No results. No responses. Just a waste of time.

But I know that’s not true.  And I know I have more traction these days. I have people willing to spread the word, people advocating the use of Mirror Mirror.

What’s been happening….

• The first two weeks in January saw scheduled training with 38 practitioners – 4 online sessions, 5 hours each.
• The vibe on each call was amazing.So much interest and enthusiasm.  There’s the demand – RIGHT THERE!
• Lots of valuable feedback from each round: edit the pre-work content; include a simulation.
• Nice work on support facilitation and follow up of contacts from virtual training partner, Steve.He’s great.
• Lots of admin managing membership invitations, invoicing, communications etc. Help from

new Operations Manager taking time to onboard, as it would, and invaluable.

The year 2020 is indeed all about these two things:

1. Growing a practitioner capability and an effective network
2. Building brand awareness, credibility and sales via network and in general

But that discomfort is still there. It’s not just about feeling the efforts could be futile, it’s about the AMBIGUITY of marketing. You have no idea who’s going to be interested to have you at a conference, publish an article, who will be reading it, where these opportunities are even.  It’s so frustratingly RANDOM. You can have a strategy, but you can’t structure everything, you can’t control it.

And there it is again. Control, goddamnit!  Come on Lindsay!  You’re old enough and wise enough to get your head around this.

After a ‘marketing brainstorm’ call with Steve and my good friend Mike, during which I can just hear the angst and retreat in my voice, I take a step back.  Guided by Mike and Steve’s advice I realise that successful marketing just is random, it’s bit by bit, it’s just picking off one opportunity at a time, and that’s ok.

• Keep generating content that’s useful.
• Keep asking people if they know of exposure opportunities.
• Use your objectives as your guide and flit around intuitively – talking to people, following up research, taking part in conversations – just like it was a Saturday and it’s ok to drift around aimlessly.
• Believe that when you keep up the positive, credible presence, STUFF BRINGS STUFF (as Steve always says : )

It’s time to learn about situational leadership once and for all.  Be intuitive when getting the word out about Mirror Mirror.  Be structured and controlling when it comes to building new products on a budget. Listen when someone you work with has a point of view. Tell people about your vision when the time is right.

Now I feel better. It’s the end of January and already, things that used to be difficult are becoming easier.  Interest from practitioners to join the training. Ideas people have about teams they could pitch to.  Proposals from people about trying out Mirror Mirror to get the experience. I have the time to for online networking, sending out materials, submitting conference proposals in a random, playful way.

And then I land my first keynote.  At a Testing Conference in Germany!  Everyone in technology seems to be interested in why it’s still all about people.  I learn that the issues testers are faced with are often the results of misalignments further up the chain.

I get invited to do a podcast.  And then another.

I start merging what I read in one place with what I read in another, and think up new content for Mirror Mirror based on both.

And I send out a newsletter, in it the vision:

Over the last decade, we’ve seen more complexity and more remote, short-term staffing. All this means more scope for misalignment, which is costly and frustrating for all. Now, imagine having a good level of alignment between people across your organization, both cognitively and behaviourally, after just 8 hours per team.  We’ll be able to offer this through our growing delivery capability of our network. Once this happens, our market will open-up: from supporting a handful of teams at a time, we’ll be helping people align across any size of organization, anywhere. They’ll have less stress and better results from a better foundation of alignment. And we believe that’s a vision worth fighting for.

Mirror Mirror – a team alignment diagnostic tool and process in one, helping people align to the strategy, as well as each other.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

I like the hypnosis download I bought recently about How to Be More Patient.  It seems to be making a difference. Actually, I like reading the descriptions they’ve written about their other available downloads.  It makes it so easy to understand the simple psychology behind unwanted mindsets.  For example, advertising the download ‘Overcoming Negativity’, here’s what the site says:

Let’s take a second to think about that critical negative voice inside your head. You know, the one that says: “I won’t be good enough” or “It’s not going to work”. 

Have you ever considered the possibility that it isn’t your voice saying these things?

That it could be someone else’s? A parent’s, or maybe a teacher’s, friend’s or a partner’s perhaps?

No one is born negative. I mean, have you ever seen a negative young child? No question is too silly, no outfit is too outrageous. So, you’re not an innately negative person, you just ‘caught’ someone else’s negativity somewhere along the line. And this means you can break your poor thinking habits and reveal the real you. The ‘you’ you were as a young child, when anything was possible.

Wow. People just need to hear those reassuring words repeated to understand what new mindset is needed to overcome their issue.  I know it’s not that easy but it’s a bit start.

Then I got to thinking about feedback I’ve received for years but never knew what do to about: “You’re trying too hard.”  What does that even mean? I’m working too hard or being too determined?

I looked for it in the list of hypnosis downloads. Nothing there.

Then I started googling.

The second link was a comment by a Julie Gunner to an excellent article in Quora.com.  Now I get it.  And it couldn’t have come at a better time.  Right before I’m about to train up 40 practitioners over the coming month.  The comment said:

“I noticed that when I wanted things the most, that desire came with a lot of force. Not only does it put more pressure on you (which makes you act differently), but it’s not attractive to others to be pushing or trying so hard… whether it’s establishing new business relationships, or personal ones.

[If you put] yourself in a position to win, you take all the pressure off.  You stop trying so hard. You’ve done what you have to do , you’ve put in the effort to be the best, and you have placed yourself in situations that if someone wants to take advantage of that expertise or who you are – they either will or won’t …   

I think if you try too hard, you try to force a particular path, and aren’t flexible to the amazing opportunities and relationship you can build if you simply focus on being the best you can be, and allowing yourself to be open.”

I have, for years, been trying to extend my sphere of influence into other people’s decision-making territory – by showing passion, by being persuasive.  But that’s not my territory and that actually turns people off.  I just need to accept that people make their own decisions and I need to give them that space.

Mirror Mirror – a team alignment diagnostic tool and process in one, helping people align to the strategy, as well as each other.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

We have 3 jobs in progress and almost all 40 places for January’s training are booked up!  The pressure is on to get the best Mirror Mirror training programme finished before Xmas. Meantime, it’s 22.00 and I’m typing in pyjamas. I want to get this written before tomorrow.

My youngest daughter was off school sick today – that hardly ever happens. She lay on the sofa looking cute interrupting my work every 5 minutes with attention-seeking comments. She’s such a sweetie but the experience for me was a mixed back: a test of infuriation, caring, patience and acceptance all at the same time.  By about 14.00 I had given up on my well-intentioned plans to spend the whole working on the training course and succumbed to distraction.

Actually, I have 6 days over next two weeks blocked to prepare the training delivery.  And what a crucial task.  Getting this right means growth. The trainings are one day virtual Mirror Mirror courses scheduled with 10 participants per time.  From the pilot training course I delivered over the summer, this one will be a major improvement.  You could say I’ve been preparing for it for months.  The content brings together the new sample reports, the new messaging, the new processes, the new concepts and new commercial parts of the business.

I’m pleased with the format of the training day.  It starts in advance of the training day with pre-read / pre-watch videos.  The day programme consists of three online sessions – each one interactive so the participants can think things through and learn from each other. There’s offline reading and tests in between the sessions. Finally, individual 2-way feedback sessions culminate in a pass or fail situation – although I’m sure most people will pass.

I might have to skulk out to coffee shops over the Xmas break to get everything properly prepared – there’s so much to do.

Sometimes I think I’m neglecting my daughters a bit with the extra hours I’m squeezing in. But then I realise I’m just busy, like any other working mum and there’s no point in feeling guilty about it.  I’m probably more being an example to them – showing them that if you’re the working type, it is possible to find a balance that works for everyone.

And as the girls are 11 and 12, they’re starting to ask questions and listen to my explanations about what I’m doing and why.  Wouldn’t it be great if they could work for Mirror Mirror – or take it over one day?

Anyway – it looks like we already have quite a team.  I have Miss X in Berlin on Product Development (involved from day 1), Miss Y is a contractor based in Maastricht who helps on the IT side, and now I have Miss Z on board with Operations Management. She’s living quite close by, now wanting to get back into the workplace for 20 hours a week or so after her kids have left home.

It takes time to explain what’s needed and set up all the back-office processes with someone new. Miss Z has spent the first two weeks getting set up with software and learning how to use the reporting tool.  We’ve set up a new job process and are using it now.

I’d like her to support on training administration, social media, materials development…  it’ll be great once she’s up to speed.  Finally, I’ll be able to concentrate on growth.

But it’s back to preparing the training for now. Wish me luck!

Mirror Mirror – a team alignment diagnostic tool and process in one, helping people align to the strategy, as well as each other.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com