Monthly Archives: April 2018

The power of TRUST – trust in the workplace.

Trust

By: Angie Falls

While reflecting on the day during the weekend I could not help myself to pick up my mobile phone and check the office mail. The first glimpse was an email from my new manager. She turned out to be a micromanager who can’t function without being part of everything on a very detailed level. It is so exhausting and it drains all my energy.

I wondered why this was the case. What could I do to make it a more agreeable situation and work relation? I feel that one of the most important things a manager can do is to trust team members.

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Every single one of us needs meaning!

IMG_0045The rock-pebble-sand-water-in-a-jar story of Dr. Stephen R. Covey (The seven habits of highly effective people) illustrates how a lack of planning can derail your life in significant ways.

The rocks represent the important things in your life such as your family, children, friends, work, or whatever you value in your life. The pebbles, sand, and water represent the less important yet necessary things you do on a regular basis such as commuting to work, running errands, answering emails, shopping, and so on.

If you do not plan your life, there’s a big chance that you will fail to put in all the big rocks in the jar of your life before everything else, so you will not be able to fit them all in. You will find in the end that your life, full as it is of endless tasks and activities, is empty because you failed to fit in important parts of it.

How much time do you spend thinking about the things you’re going to do one day? Do you initiate things in your life or do you just react? Do you feel that life is slipping by quicker than you would like? Have you ever experienced that restless, anxious feeling and weren’t sure what to do about it?

Planning your life helps achieve your purpose. It doesn’t really matter what it is, as long as it is something you want. Planning your life is all about finding out who you are as a person, what makes you tick, what your values are and what deeply satisfies your soul.

Of course there will be many things beyond us in life. Mapping out your future does not mean that things will happen this way. I am 100% sure that there is no chance that my life will turn out exactly the way I envision it to. And that is OK: the beauty of life is in the unexpected and unplanned events.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.comanja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

Lindsay’s In Business: PART 44: We’re only human after all

IMG_0056What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

It’s 8pm and I’m at Copenhagen airport waiting for my flight back to The Netherlands. For the past two days, I’ve been at a communications conference in an amazing old University building. All considered, it was a worthwhile experience. I presented at my best on the first morning – “What is Social Alignment and How It Links to Performance”. Today I got two solid leads. Very pleased.

The other presenters talked about communicating in change, about how to facilitate a virtual group, about psychology, and about all sorts of other stuff. I find the stuff about how humans work most interesting. Apparently, the average person makes around 35,000 decisions every day. Great stat! (Trying to find out where it came from). And I really liked a guy called Antoni Lacinai – great speaker – who argues that the analogue world is more important than the digital world. His piece included this (paraphrased):

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Embrace your own personal style and ways of expressing yourself through your office decor

IMG_0048We spend a lot of time at work and research has shown that people perform better when they work in a pleasant environment, clean offices, with natural light, plants, comfortable furniture etc. (see, for example, http://smartbusinesstrends.com/tips-creating-healthy-efficient-positive-work-environment/) and are able to customize their work space to some degree. In fact, we see a lot of firms (Hubspot, Dropbox, Skype, Evernote, AirBnB etc. http://mashable.com/2014/01/09/playful-workspaces/) that design work spaces that reflect the company culture and often provide ‘play’ areas as well as quiet spaces to give their employees the freedom to move between different work environments that suit their needs and moods.

It is important that you remain true to yourself when you are at work rather than hide your true personality to fit a work ‘ideal’. If you are a warm, homely person it is fine to convey that to your work colleagues. How you decorate your office does say something about you and can be a conversation starter when unfamiliar people visit you, so it is worth considering what subtle messages you want to convey and the topics you are happy to discuss with strangers. It is good to have individuals within an organization who are different from the norm since they can provide refreshing perspectives and challenge the status quo and ‘groupthink’. If you are individualistic and happy to be out on a limb, celebrate and remember the value that you bring by being different.

However, be aware that your style may not come across well to everyone you meet and that some people may overlook you if they do not see you as leadership material or capable of working on special assignments. Tune in to how others behave towards you and continually sense how you are coming across.

Study how other people decorate their offices; do they personalize them with photos of loved ones, drawings by their children, art, etc. or do they stick to company-supplied pictures and posters, business awards or nothing at all? If most people tend towards a more neutral, business-like environment then you might consider toning down your own office décor without eliminating all traces of your personal life. If you are unsure, ask a trusted colleague for his/her honest opinion.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

 

How do you know when you need a coach?

There’s a fine line between ‘I’m not having a good day, I’ll be ok tomorrow’ and ‘I don’t think I can meet my goals without expert guidance’. Knowing at what point to seek professional support through the help of a coach is crucial.

Coaching is for those who recognise they have wandered off their path and need to realign themselves again – be it in business, life or relationships. It is not counselling, mentoring, therapy or training. What a coach does is listen to your aspirations and goals, recognise the obstacles that are standing in your way, and provide actionable solutions to enable you to fulfil your ambitions in a measurable, simple and successful way.

Seeking a coach demonstrates that you wish to improve and that you recognise that you need an expert to guide you. Every great sports person has a coach to thank for pushing them, motivating them, encouraging them and supporting them in their journey…life and business coaches do exactly that too.

So how do you know when you need a coach?

According to Alexis Meads, there are ten tell-tale signs that you need a coach in your life.

1. Your friends and family are tired of listening to you

It’s wonderful to have a support network around you, but don’t exhaust your friend’s kindness by going over the same thing every time you meet them. A coach is a professional listener who isn’t worried about telling you how it is – but not only will they listen, they will also give you a concrete plan to follow in order to overcome the struggles you are facing.

2. You over-analyze everything

There is such a thing as over-thinking things and if your mind is full of questions and no answers then it’s time to seek professional help from someone that can untangle the tangled knot of questions inside your mind.

3. Your relationship problems are making you ill

Mental strain has a physical affect on the body. If you aren’t happy with your relationship then you need to find a way to handle that – and ignoring it or repeating the same mistakes won’t help. Through the help of a coach you can find clarity and confidence again.

4. You’re not happy with your weight

Health and life coaches can advise on weight loss, fitness, nutrition and exercise plans but most of all they can give you the motivation you need to stick to your plan and reach your goals. Everyone knows that having someone by your side when trying to get fit is easier than going at it alone!

5. You’ve lost your identity

Whether you’ve recently moved abroad, had children, changed as you’ve got older or inexplicably lost confidence – coaching can help you feel like the old you again. Or alternatively, help you reinvent a new happier and more positive you.

6. You have Imposter Syndrome

On the outside you’re rocking it, but on the inside you’re crippled with self doubt, insecurity, worry and anxiety. A good coach can alleviate that stress and empower you with the skills to feel just as good on the inside as people believe you are on the outside.

7. You’re not at the point in your career you thought you would be

It’s nobody’s fault but yours, but you don’t know where you’re going wrong. Do you lack confidence to seek alternative employment? Or do you need to improve on your leadership skills and communication techniques? Our coaches will recognise the obstacles standing in the way of your success and give you the tools to ensure that you reach your career goals.

8. You’re stuck

Your life is in a rut. You’re bored. You’re wondering if there’s anything else out there for you or if this monotonous treadmill you call life is as good as it gets. Don’t worry, it can always get better, you just need a push in the right direction by a life coach that will understand your concerns and show you the light.

9. You have no social life

It’s not just the work and family life balance that a coach can help you wish, they can also assist with helping you find the all important ‘me’ time. Hobbies, mindfulness, interests and fun are just as important as family and earning a wage.

10. You worry about what others think

This is all too common in an age of over-sharing, but this form of thinking can be paralysing and in the long term affect all areas of your life. In order to reach your goals you need to be confident, fearless and positive. Coaching can help you value your self worth while providing ways for you to protect yourself from the opinions of others.

So if any of these points sound like you then you may benefit from coaching. Coaching is not a last resort, far from it. Coaching is a way of reigniting that internal spark that makes you want to be a better you. So get over your first obstacle and get in touch – we may just change your life.

 

Visit Koach.net to discover how our coaches can help you find clarity at work and at home, and can lead you to a more successful and fulfilled you.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

Situation 36: Female Leadership Mentoring

Help you to succeed in life and work

Femsy admits that self-confidence remains an issue for her. She sometimes finds it tough to operate in a macho environment. Furthermore she feels she does not have a strong network. She agrees with boss to find a third party mentor.

(Click on the pictures to see them in full size)

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Lindsay’s In Business: PART 43: On values

IMG_0053

What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds… 

For a long time, I’ve had my doubts about ‘values’.

  • In terms of behaviours, don’t people use different values under different circumstances?
  • How can an organization say they want people to ‘take on’ certain values when we all have our own?
  • How do values relate to personality?

I was interested in this because of the design of Mirror Mirror. Was I missing something?

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