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Reviewed by Femflection
New York Times best-selling author and world champion adventure racer Robyn Benincasa accepts full responsibility for inspiring people to do insane things like climb Mount Kilimanjaro, run their first triathlon, start their own adventure racing teams, or launch their own businesses. After all, that is who she is and what she does: an adventurer who inspires people to do amazing things.
In her 15-year career as a professional adventure racer, Benincasa has competed in close to 40 expedition-length events – gnarly, multiday, multisport killers such as Primal Quest and Eco-Challenge. She has biked through jungles in Borneo, climbed Himalayan giants in Nepal, trekked across lava fields in Fiji, rafted rapids in Chile – and racked up multiple world championship titles along the way. In her spare time, she is a full-time firefighter in San Diego on the nation’s first all-female crew.
Her latest book, How Winning Works: 8 Essential Leadership Lessons from the Toughest Teams on Earth, hit the shelves in May 2012 and was quickly dubbed a New York Times bestseller. Continue reading
Reviewed by Femflection
Phyllis Chesler (born October 1, 1940) is an American writer, psychotherapist, and professor emerita of psychology and women’s studies at the College of Staten Island (CUNY). She is known as a feminist psychologist, and is the author of 16 books, including the best-seller Women and Madness (1972). Chesler has written on topics such as gender, mental illness, divorce and child custody, surrogacy, second-wave feminism, pornography, prostitution, incest, and violence against women. Continue reading
According to a 2010 study in the journal Psychological Science, “women have a lower threshold for what constitutes offensive behavior,” and hence are more likely to see a need for an apology in everyday situations.
Women apologize more, and they seem to do so to be compliant and empathetic.
Should women “man up?”
Could apologizing be holding women back at work?
- “Excuse me, may I ask…”
- “I might be wrong, but …”
- “I don’t know, but…”
Phrases like the above litter your speech, and each time you use one, you weaken your own voice. When you say what you mean in a direct, straightforward manner, you’ll be heard, understood and respected.
Knowing how to communicate with confidence sends the message that you are self-assured, proud of your skills, and comfortable in expressing your ideas.
When you stop saying sorry, you allow yourself to grow into the most confident version of yourself.
Ann Friedman believes it’s up to society to change the sorry game and wrote a story that followed Crosley’s, aptly titled, “Can We Just, Like, Get Over the Way Women Talk?”. She believes women shouldn’t be forced to “question [their] voice.” If all women were to change their speech patterns to fit a prescribed, “powerful” norm, our cadence “would lose the casual, friendly tone we wanted it to have and its special feeling of intimacy…it wouldn’t be ours anymore.”
There is power in empathy. Apologizing isn’t what keeps women out of high-powered jobs they deserve. It’s not the “sorry” that’s the problem. It’s the sexism.
On a regular basis I am meeting people who have become experts in feeling miserable, frustrated or even anxious. Whatever happens, their very first reaction is negative. This does not happen consciously or deliberately. They have, over time, unconsciously, trained themselves in becoming outstanding in negative thinking.
It does not matter who you are and how you perceive life, the destructive habits below will make you feel bad. So, make sure you are not picking up these habits! Continue reading