Tag Archives: selfdevelopment



By: Angie Falls

I find myself in the position to attend some introduction days at Universities. After attending 2 and 2 to go I realized I needed to change my behavior concerning knowledge. I felt that I had to put more effort in appreciating knowledge and knowledge sources.

The first step I took was reorganizing my library. While performing that activity I discovered that there were many books that I had to read again. Books that I had collected the past 32 years. The same methodology and core principles are still applied in my life and work. Time to refresh and pour this knowledge in my mind.

In one of the sessions at the University, the topic anthropology was so fascinating that I started taking notes. Notes of theory which I needed to study to apply in my profession.

The skill that stuck with me to investigate is critical thinking. The earliest documentation of critical thinking are the teachings of Socrates recorded by Plato.

Critical thinking is the objective analysis of facts to form a judgment.

The subject is complex, and several different definitions exist, which generally include the rational, skeptical, unbiased analysis, or evaluation of factual evidence. Critical thinking is self-directed, self-disciplined, self-monitored, and self-corrective thinking. It presupposed assent to rigorous standards of excellence and mindful command to their use.

Someone with critical thinking skills can:

  • Understand the links between ideas.
  • Determine the importance and relevance of arguments and ideas.
  • Recognize, build and appraise arguments.
  • Identify inconsistencies and errors in reasoning.
  • Approach problems in a consistent and systematic way.

It entails effective communication and problem-solving abilities, as well as a commitment to overcome our native egocentrism and sociocentrism.

Further reading on egocentrism was useful.

Egocentrism is the inability to differentiate between self and other. More specifically, it is the inability to untangle subjective schemas from objective reality and an inability to understand or assume any perspective other than one’s own.

Stretching this to my corporate life there are many situation that I feel are evolved on this very principal.

When there are discussions between employees I often sense a power struggle to emphasize their own view leaving no room for the other person’s perspective. There is always tendency of aggression.

To understand why people would communicate violently I started a training in non-violent communication of Marshall Rosenberg.

What is Nonviolent Communication?

Nonviolent Communication is the integration of 4 things:

  • Consciousness: a set of principles that support living a life of compassion, collaboration, courage, and authenticity
  • Language: understanding how words contribute to connection or distance
  • Communication: knowing how to ask for what we want, how to hear others even in disagreement, and how to move toward solutions that work for all
  • Means of influence: sharing “power with others” rather than using “power over others

Now I can start my discovery learning path. There were yet many instances of communication for me to improve and to get better skilled at.

It turned out to be very difficult if you are ego driven.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com




By: Angie Falls

Once in a while my attention is attracted by icons in history. I strongly believe that there is always a lesson to be learned. Currently I am fascinated by Marcus Aurelius.

He was the last of the so-called FiveGoodEmperors.

He was a practitioner of Stoicism, and his untitled writing, commonly known as Meditations, is a significant source of the modern understanding of ancient Stoic philosophy.

Continue reading

It is Great to Know You don’t Know ….

IMG_0044Admitting you don’t know something could be seen as a sign of weakness. What do you do?

First of all relax.

Don’t stress about it.

You don’t come into the job knowing all there is to know about everything.

No matter what is your day to day work, it’s absolutely normal not to know everything. You’ll keep your credibility by saying, “I don’t know, but I’ll check for the answer”, than trying to answers with information you aren’t sure.


You probably know those people who are sure they know everything because they think they’ve seen it all and done it all. They’ve stopped learning.

They believe they’ve accumulated enough knowledge. They are afraid of learning something new because that causes them to call into question the absolute validity of their experiences and knowledge.

However, in todays’ fast changing world it is impossible to know everything.

Continue reading


IMG_0049As women, we are not naturals at delegating – while often men are.

Maybe it is due to our genes, hormones or just our ability to multi-task, but for most of us it is easy to go into overdrive. We tend to slip into the responsibility mode all too easy.

And still we tend to think that “delegating” equals asking for help because we are not able to do something, when for most men it means a sign of leadership.

Most of us, still feel this need to show that we are able to do everything ourselves to avoid being perceived as weak.

Our lives might be so much easier and less stressed if we could let take someone else take some of the burden.

Sharing tasks allows you to focus on the things that you need and want to do, rather than extra work that just needs to get done.

Delegating to others is not only helpful, it’s crucial to your success. As you advance in your career and begin taking on larger and larger projects, you won’t be able to juggle all of your responsibilities and keep up with a high standard of work, too.

Continue reading

Self-Reflection my greatest asset


By: Angie Falls

Just the other day I came across an article about Winston Churchill. The part that stuck with me;

Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never — in nothing, great or small, large or petty — never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense.” —Winston Churchill

The focus was on Winston Churchill being stubborn and determined.

Continue reading



 By: Anja Uitdehaag

 “If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.” — Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

All kids dream big. They want to be super famous, super meaningful, super powerful superheroes. (I used to spend quite a bit of time dreaming about doing something special and be famous for making a positive difference to the whole world in my own way.)

As we mature, these dreams are typically educated out of us. With age comes “wisdom” and a more “practical” perspective. We lower our expectations and often fear failure and risk taking.

Such a shame!

Continue reading

happiness is a choice.


By: Angie Falls

Just last week I went to an event which was focused on happiness. What is happiness and how can we achieve that state in life? It made me think about my own situation. My personal life and my work life. Do I have the good work-life balance? Am I not too much busy with work and neglecting my personal relationships? In the end, it is all about relationships. How to get new relationships and most of all how to maintain the relationships. I love meeting new people. Get to know them through their stories.

Continue reading