Category Archives: Articles

Lindsay’s In Business: PART 38: Blind Faith

 

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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

Hi again – I’ve been blogging with Femflections for just over a year now and thanks to those who have been reading and sent over good vibes during that time. As you know, it’s been a tougher ride than I thought it would be so far and now I’m going to send some good vibes out back to you, whoever you are, just because I can 😊.

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How time flies.

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By: Angie Falls

The new year has begun and it gives me time to reflect on the past year. How exciting has it been? In a short time span, I was privileged to follow up on so many new adventures. Little did I know when I started my coaching study how it would develop. As a professional working in an international environment taught me a lot about communicating with people from different cultures. I wanted to develop this skill on a different level by coaching individuals who graduate and want to have a job experience in an international setting. This turned out to be very successful and one day when I was having lunch with an acquaintance I communicated about the excitement of this new activity. She shared with me that she was looking for a person with expert knowledge on expats. Her company was approached with a new assignment for which she did not have the in-house knowledge. This new assignment she would dare to pursue if I would assist. I instantly agreed and together we started this new chapter in our mutual lives. I was trained by her with the theoretical approach which was developed for this type of coaching. Along the way, she would be my coach for this assignment. The assignment was family coaching in the most extended way you can imagine and mostly for a track of 1 year. It involved the integration of another culture and the way of living. When a highly skilled migrant is invited by a company they mostly leave their home country with their families. Coaching is primarily with the focus on growing children at the age of approximately 16 years and their spouses who need to adapt life in a new country. I started a course Introduction to Psychology to get a better understanding of people in general. The whole coaching process turned out to be very time consuming for me and there were occasions during the coaching track that I needed assistance from behavioral specialists. I ventilated this to my acquaintance with an advice concerning collaboration with other colleagues. She granted me this and I was promoted to manager of the assignment. Two behavioral specialists were introduced to me. I had to select one to assist on this specific assignment. The candidate that I had the best connection with was very well organized in her presentation and a very likable person to collaborate with. When I started working with her she also could report and document on a high level. All of that for a student who graduated and just finished her internship to start her first assignment for the company with me. I discussed the assignment with her and the actions we had to take. I could share with her my knowledge and learn from her as a behavioral specialist. While working on the first assignment I was offered a new assignment to work on. I told my acquaintance that I would like to coordinate this assignment only if I could agree on this with the behavioral specialist with whom I am working right now. I felt that we were the perfect duo for both the assignments. That became coaching journey number two. My goals for 2018? 2018 make way here I come!

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

Lindsay’s In Business: PART 37: Doing things differently in 2018 

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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

They say that if you keep doing what you always did, you get what you always got.

Here are four things I’m going to do differently in 2018 so that I get different results from the ones I got in 2017:

  • I’m going to target those who I think want to buy Mirror Mirror the most
  • I’m going to articulate the problem and the solution in ways that people can better relate to
  • I’m going to focus on building the relationship rather than transacting a sale
  • I’m going to relax my expectations and take each step at a time.

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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A New Year is like a blank book and the pen is in your hands. It is your chance to write a beautiful story for yourself.

Make your life choices based on your own wants, beliefs, and values. Don’t live your life based on the expectations of those around you and the prescriptions you acquired in your past.

When you live a life that you cherish, everything around you holds more meaning. You are likely to be kinder, more considerate, and more understanding of others and their paths in life.

Believe in yourself, follow your passions and live your dreams! With courage, faith and great effort, you shall achieve everything you desire.

Wishing you good health, happiness and success in the coming year and always.

Happy New Year!

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com

 

Having a manager but still unmanaged

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By: Angie Falls

In my view, managers are facilitators of their team members’ success. They ensure that their team members have everything they need to be productive and successful; that they’re well trained, happy and have minimal roadblocks in their path; that they’re being groomed for the next level; that they are recognized for great performance and coached through their challenges.

It has been now 6 years that I am at an organization where I have performed in a team with 2 different managers.

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Lindsay’s In Business: PART 36: Understanding things

Jake – Adventure Time

What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

It’s December. We can’t help ourselves look back and review the year past.

Here are a few things I’ve noticed:

  • If you can identify the question, no matter how obvious it seems, write it down. Have faith, an answer will come up.
    • I wanted to firm up my ‘target’ market – find the people who would be most susceptible to the Mirror Mirror offer. Once I knew that was what I was looking for, ‘agile’ came up: companies transiting to agile would need help to align its people.

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You are not your mistakes

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By: Anja Uitdehaag 

To make mistakes is human; to stumble is commonplace; to be able to laugh at yourself is maturity – William Arthur Ward

Making no mistakes is, of course, impossible.

There are some very interesting gender differences in how men and women view mistakes. In “How Men Think”, Adrienne Mendell notes the different reactions of men and women regarding their mistakes. Women, in general, have a more difficult time when they make mistakes. She says this is because women are socialized to feel differently about mistakes. Boys are raised to be respected by their team if they learn from what they did wrong. Mistakes provide an opportunity to do better the next time.

But for girls, it is different. When girls make mistakes, they are consoled. This reinforces the idea that they should feel badly about the mistakes.

Mendell compared two partners in an architectural firm who made a mistake on a contract. The woman was devastated and wanted to give up for the rest of the day. The male partner was not ready to give in. He believed that even though the problem was severe, it could be solved. He worked through the night, resolved the issue and they got the contract.

The bottom line, according to Mendell, is that women not only focus on mistakes, but often draw greater attention to them than is necessary. Men are more inclined to forget them and move on or fix them.

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happiness is a choice.

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By: Angie Falls

Just last week I went to an event which was focused on happiness. What is happiness and how can we achieve that state in life? It made me think about my own situation. My personal life and my work life. Do I have the good work-life balance? Am I not too much busy with work and neglecting my personal relationships? In the end, it is all about relationships. How to get new relationships and most of all how to maintain the relationships. I love meeting new people. Get to know them through their stories.

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Lindsay’s In Business: PART 35: Fascinating stuff 

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What happens when you realise your path is entrepreneurship rather than employment? Lindsay takes up the challenge and shares an account of her journey as it unfolds…

 Hi – there’s an update below but meantime, isn’t this fascinating!

“The real challenge in crafting strategy lies in detecting the subtle discontinuities that may undermine a business in the future. And for that, there is no technique, no program, just a sharp mind in touch with the situation.”

Henry Mintzberg

That means that planning and refining a strategy is hugely dependent on feedback from people at the coalface…

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7 ways expats struggle more than most

The life of an expat may seem like a glamorous one. Many expats move abroad for better job opportunities, or for the lifestyle, or even for the fantastic weather and to enjoy a big adventure. From the outside, life seems full of possibilities and excitement…but being an expat is fraught with an array of unique problems that those remaining in their birth country may never understand.

Here are seven ways expats struggle more than others.

1. Communication barriers

Most expats speak English, but that doesn’t help when you are relocated to a country where they don’t. Even if you speak English at home and at work and you are doing your best to learn the host country’s language, it takes time to settle in, and in the meantime you are left struggling with issues that would normally be a walk in the park. Simple things like letters from the doctor’s office or the council; your television not working but not understanding the message that pops up on the screen; calling a company on the phone and not understanding the automated recording or what number to press – these tiny little inconveniences can lead to a sense of frustration, anxiety and in some cases anger or feelings of hopelessness and inadequacy.

2. Culture

One of the many reasons that expats look for work abroad is to submerge themselves in a new culture, but the flipside of that is that some cultures are hard to integrate into and difficult to align with your own customs and expectations…no matter how hard you try. Coupled with the communication barriers, it can sometimes feel very isolating and frustrating, you may feel cut off from your community and confused – or even worse, regretful of your move.

3. Losing your identity

Most expats move abroad for work – but if you move as a family, what about the other partner? What are they expected to do? Even though in a lot of cases one partner has moved the family because their new wage justifies the life change, the second partner is left to carve out a new identity for themselves. Do they embrace this change and start a new career? Train in something new? Reinvent themselves? Or will they be left feeling inferior, lost and unsure of their new role? These feelings of uncertainty, and sometimes resentment, can have a negative effect on the entire family and put pressure on the marriage. Without the usual support network around you, this shift can be even harder to manage.

4. Relocating family

It’s hard enough to move abroad and start afresh by yourself or as a couple, but what if you’re also trying to settle your children into a new school and a new way of life? Although children are pretty adaptable, and the children of expats probably more so than most, the knock-on effect of an anxious child can put pressure on the parent and affect marriages and alter the family dynamic.

5. Feelings of isolation

It takes a long time to create a community around you and to make friends. As a child, making friends and connecting with people is a normal part of life – but as you get older if becomes more forced and harder to do. When you are busy at home with family, and at work, how do you go out there and force yourself to get involved in your community and seek alliances with others?

An expat life can be a lonely one at times. It’s difficult to be separated from good friends and family, and it’s hard to live without emotional or practical support at hand, which is why some expats lose confidence or suffer from anxiety issues which they may previously not encountered.

6. Uncertainty

With the current political and financial climate, no job is a guaranteed job for life. So what happens when you experience feelings of uncertainty but you are abroad and dependent on that one job that brought you there? What if you are unhappy but there are limited options outside of your current role? When most people don’t like their job they are free to seek another nearby – but for an expat, that move is likely to be a huge one, one that affects the lives of the entire family including the children’s education, the partner’s job and the family’s lifestyle. When you feel like you lack choice in your career, it can lead to feelings of hopelessness, anxiety, stress, depression and ill health.

7. Lack of confidence

What makes us feel confident? The decisions we make in life, the encouragement and support of friends and family, our sense of worth at home and at work, and our own definition of who we are in society as a whole. So what happens when we are stripped of all of that? How do we feel when we are in a foreign country where everything we know, and everything that we feel defines us, is no longer the same? It takes on average a year to settle into a new country, and in that time you can experience the highest of highs and lowest of lows.

Being an expat is not all negative, far from it, or millions around the globe wouldn’t be jumping from country to country chasing exciting new job opportunities – but it is challenging.

Your story, our platform: If you’ve got a story and would like to share it with other Femflectors, please let us know. Femflection is all about transferring learnings to help others, be they big or subtle. We want to connect with your feelings, your learnings, your reflections or your hopes for the future – in blog or interview format. Express yourself here. Get in touch with us via anja.uitdehaag@femflection.com

For more content visit our website http://www.femflection.com